I do not adore Mondays. Neither does Lee. And it's no secret around our house - although we do our best to laugh it off and maintain a glass is half full mentality.
Today was no exception. I started off my day in a funk.
Congested. Tired. Funky.
I was just in one of those moods. You know? Where you can't put your finger on it buy you just want to stay in your PJs and throw a pity party. Only you can't throw pity parties when you have work to do and a 15 month old to raise.
But you can lament the growing to-do list on your kitchen counter and fake a smile when your little one notices your gimpy mood. Where's my paci? I wanted to ask.
By the end of my e-mail typing, diaper changing, toy pick-uping morning, I had to get out of the house. So I threw my little bundle of joy (no really, I mean it) into my car and headed toward Louisville. Nothing a little Target (Tarjay) can't cure.
Only my happy little joy drive away from reality came to a sudden halt when I was stopped in front of a nearby elementary school so that every single bus and car could pull out. Are you kidding me? Patience, God, please, you know I need a good, big heaping.
I was so fed up with the traffic in town that I decided to hop on the interstate, where I was stopped for interlude #2 for road construction. Okay, God, not funny.
I finally pulled up to the big red dot, which Walker called "baa" over and over (for balloon). After saving my child from being crushed by the cart pushers in the little cart assembly line inside the door, I rushed the the clothing section for a little retail therapy. Oh, happy place, here I come.
I found several adorable and affordable tops, skirts and dresses. Score. But a short trip to the dressing room reminded me why I don't shop in juniors anymore. You couldn't pay me $16.99 to wear that skirt in public I wanted to shout at the fitting clerk. And why you're at it, please install some warm lighting and slimming mirrors. You obviously don't want to sell clothes today. Grrrr. I managed to find one decent (aka not mini) skirt and a sparkly blouse.
After picking up some socks for a local clothing drive, I headed to the checkout. Alright, you got me. I did pick out a few more things. Which made my bill way too high for a 30 minutes trip to Tarjay.
I rushed home to change into my workout clothes. My sister met me there minutes later to inform me that my house smelled like onions on Friday (I was cooking potato soup w/lots of onions) and that she smelled like onions when she got home, meaning Lee and I probably smelled like onions at the two Christmas parties we attended that evening. Only I was too congested to notice. Not cool.
I tried to brush off the onion debacle as I sped toward the gym for a good workout. A couple of miles and 1,500 dumbbell curls later, I ran to my car to head home for dinner. There was a message on my phone.
That message changed my Monday.
It was from a friend going through a difficult situation. A very, very difficult situation. Much worse than the ill-fitting skinny jeans I tried on at Tarjay. Or the crumbs I had to clean up after lunch.
Those 35 seconds spoke volumes to my heart.
It reminded me of another conversation that I had with a friend this morning whose aunt was just diagnosed with breast cancer.
It reminded me that I am really, really, really, really self-centered sometimes. Many times.
I have a baby whose diapers I get to change and whose hand I get to hold. And we don't need strangers to buy us socks at Tarjay. And I have a husband who I can complain to when my day is yucky. And I own a car to drive me down the road. And my little cold will not keep me in the hospital. Or require surgery.
Lord, please forgive me for being so selfish and hard to please. Forgive me for missing out on the joy that you had for me this morning. Forgive me for focusing on me and my hang-ups and not on You. Lord, comfort those who are truly hurting tonight. Those who have physical illness. And emotional hurt. And true hardship. Those are the people who hold your heart - your peace, provision and healing. In Christ's name, Amen.
I do know one little guy who has got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in his heart...